Her moving on was almost immediate. In fact, it was as if she had swapped them out as if she had traded cars.
He was the old car left in the parking lot to possibly be picked up by someone else. It happened so fast he didn’t have the time to react in any other way but to blow his gaskets and pump exhaust from all the pores in his body. He felt tossed away despite all the time he spent loyally working and being there for her, now about to be hauled off to the scrap yard where he’ll be stripped of every mile that they put on the road together, the asphalt and the dusty dirt roads. The rocks were still trapped in his treads which he tried to pick out with a pocket knife with the time he now spent idling.
They were friends first. He knew that was why it hurt like his chest was the inside of a firing cylinder, then an overheating radiator as he spewed steam from his nostrils. The truth was he had a lot of work to be done internally and one of the excuses she gave was she couldn’t fix him and her, tow his weight and hers too.
But wasn’t it her who got mad if he didn’t tell her how he was feeling?
It amazed him the way that time changes people and usually not for the positive and oft, in his life, in the other direction away from him. Those scars he wore like scratches in his paint. He wishes he could heal them completely but his memory would not unhook itself from those memories. It made him want to rip the rearview mirror from the windshield so he could stop looking back when he was trying to move forward and away from everything but he feared the repercussions of changing without it. There was no way for him to win.
The fire died with time, with disuse and distance. But every now and again he would check his mirrors only to find her face closer than it appeared. It took all he had not put the gas through the floor and fly head on into twisted metal oblivion. Fear and sense always kicked in. To stop feeling pissed off every time he saw her at someone else’s wheel was all he really wanted.
He was tired of giving mileage to someone who wasn’t putting gas in the tank.