Give Me Strength

How many times…
HOW MANY TIMES
have I, in moments
of intense stress and distress
hit my already arthritic knees
and prayed…
HOW MANY TIMES
have I asked, you GOD
“PLEASE, GIVE ME STRENGTH
I’m failing in this monumental task
of living life against the
GUSTS and gale force winds
of hardship and sorrow that
rip holes in the sails of my chest
and knock me down.”
But I get back up.
And I get back up again.
And again.

’til finally I lose all strength and
sink deeper into the folds of my blankets
and I forget about getting out of bed
that day.
And I stay there until the feeling subsides
or I am able to pep talk myself
into opening my eyes and raising
my head up high another time

Little and all too well (at the same time)
did I know that this was part of YOUR plan
As I trekked through life learning about you
and how to follow you from stronger and smarter men
Drawing strength from them in their heart
and in their wisdom
I drank amply from the deep waters
and leaned heavily on their shoulders
I was still a child and still am,
still learning the ways to live life
in a way that is most pleasing to you

Ironically…
DEAR GOD, YOU GAVE ME STRENGTH
finally in a time when I am most in need
YOU have helped me push away from
leaning heavily on anyone but you.
But I still don’t FULLY UNDERSTAND
I’m just ONE MAN living a LONELY existence
something I feel deep within my soul
and it weights down the soles of my boots
as I traverse the concrete nightly
and stare at YOUR night sky wondering
if perhaps there’s one up there just for me
But here I stand, finally strong
in my WEAKNESS I am willing
to toe the line and be faithful
even when I feel like I’m standing alone

Dear GOD give me STRENGTH
CONTINUE, I BEG OF YOU
DON’T LEAVE ME TO ME
TO MY OWN DEVICES.
I’m tired but I can feel your hands
holding me
pointing my eyes towards the sky
so I remember the promise
you made to a man who once stood alone, too.
And you kept that promise.
You always do.

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