In Bright Red

You must understand
I am not an artist
at least not in the
conventional sense or
as limited as my talent
gets.
The magic weaving of
a brush across an empty
canvas was never gripped
between my bony hands
and I could never
work well with
coordinating and
uncoordinating color
because of my
own sense
of blindness to the hues
that get planted
on yer pallet.
So, understand that I am
in awe of what people can do
with a simple stroke of a
brush to their chosen
medium.
My mind never really
worked that way.
Though I can see vivid
technicolor nightmares
that tear holes in the fabric
of my thoughts
I could never find the right
way to translate them to paper.
The old cliché is that a picture
is worth a thousand words.
I think I can honestly, and with humility
claim that I’ve gone far and beyond
that number and I don’t think
anyone really gets it.
You can’t get inside,
in between these temples
and see what neurons firing
violently can do.
The color red is most vivid
in my dreams.
A red so powerful and bright
you could say it was almost
ideal.
When it fell upon the shoulders
of a black dress it was
like a bomb exploding in my
retinas
even though I wasn’t
really seeing it.
And then again, the black
against the paleness of the walls
to where the skin of arms
almost fades into the skin of the wall.
And the color only becomes more striking
when surrounded by
gold, black and bronze clockwork
ticking away her steps as she
added the distance between us
and my hope was subtracted
from the moment but…
With such vivid colors,
my mind must have become preoccupied
because the thought never crossed my mind
whether the color would come back or not
and I woke before I could find out.
And when dream becomes reality
I realize it is time that I hold fast to
what I have and to the hope
that when colors are painted
on the inside of my brain
only to be let loose on the
white of a page in black characters
that while my nightmares may come true
the reality of the situation is,
I must maintain grip on hope
that my dreams may see the light
of the canvas yet.
In bright red.

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